Hungover

Today I’m reflecting on how I feel about starting this 100 Days of Creation exercise/madness.

Brené Brown talks of a “vulnerability hangover”, that feeling of getting out of your comfort zone, of putting yourself out there and then, when you have, feeling a range of emotions from shame to regret to fear for having exposed yourself to the world.

I definitely have some of that, AND it’s not too bad.

I’m also thinking about the truth that confidence is not a pre-requisite to do something that is edgy for us. Courage is what we need.

Courage comes BEFORE confidence. Confidence is simply the RESULT of being continually courageous.

My courage was high, my confidence … not so much.

Then I had an insight that the vulnerability hangover has something to do with the gap between our courage and our confidence. If you are 100% confident - genuine grounded confidence, not a gung-ho leap into the unknown kind of confidence - then it’s unlikely you’ll be lying in bed all day with a vulnerability hangover, no matter what the outcome.

But where’s the value in 100% confidence? How will that serve you in your life’s journey? How comfortable and boring is it to be 100% confident all the time. How small is the world of someone who only acts when 100% confident?

Say you are a CEO getting ready to share your vision for your company and you are 100% confident. Are you really thinking big enough? Are you really looking to create the changes required for the next phase? Are you playing safe?

You’ll know you’re on the right path if:

• you feel the need for courage in order to act

• you don’t feel 100% confident

• the result is a vulnerability hangover

As Brené says, vulnerability is our most accurate measure of courage. And courage is where it all starts. Courage leads to action which leads to results which leads to confidence.

And having written this, I’m wondering why my vulnerability hangover isn’t so bad.

Tell me about yours.

Jon

This article is part of 100 Days of Creation, my challenge to myself to write 100 articles in 140 days, each taking no longer than 30 minutes to write and publish.